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GAYS AND SCHOOL OF PREJUDICES - gayprojectforum - 02-09-2018

Hi Project,

I am a guy 19 years old, I will soon take my final exams and leave the school. I cannot wait! Because for me it was a negative experience under too many points of view. I state that I have always had good results, not excellent but certainly good and I like studying, but at school I felt like I was in prison, in an environment where I had to pretend and be an acrobat not to end up in ridicule and marginalization. 
 
I'm a normal guy, but I'm gay, I've never gone after girls and when girls come after me I feel uncomfortable and I don’t know how to get rid of them and they feel rejected and it's unpleasant for both of us.
 
Today I read the planning document of the school for the next year (I will not be here!), a series of films is expected to be shown on alcohol, drugs, homosexuality and violence among young people. They put homosexuality in the middle between drugs and violence! For them, however, gays are deviant and are very similar to alcoholic and violent people. You can see the prejudices even in these things.
 
Then the lessons, a grotesque thing, the teacher of Italian who knows the book by heart and is passionate of D'Annunzio, has exalted him in all the sauces, we did so much literature even recent but not Gadda, not Pasolini, not Bassani (writers related to homosexuality), fortunately I had read them on my own and perhaps it’s better that she didn’t treat them, in Latin she’s passionate of Ovid, mah! When she spoke of Petronius, she presented him as if Petronius were a sort of implicit moralist whipping homosexuality and the book, chosen by her, mentions homosexuality in Petronius in a single line and in terms of hypothesis! Or our teacher and the scientist who wrote the book have never read Petronius, what I don’t believe, or the need to censor is such that they must lower just to consciously falsify things for quiet living and to present Petronius as a half priest!
 
The teacher of Science, I say of Science not of Philosophy, takes for granted that being gay is a mental illness and that people become gay and therefore we must be careful! Her words! It is almost unbelievable that a person who in many other things has his own serious competence, at least for what I can understand, on issues that touch homosexuality is completely dominated by absurd preconceptions.
 
The teacher of Mathematics, when it happened to talk about these things, immediately put them aside saying that he still had so much to do with the program and that he could not "waste time".
 
The teacher of Philosophy is a bit better but she also flies over certain topics, at least she doesn’t say that gays are abnormal and, given the environment of my school, that’s already something.
 
I also attend Religion lessons, above all to see how they turn it over, the teacher is a young, slightly sticky priest, who always does the funny guy with the students, everybody's friend, but he gives me the impression of one who plays a part. With him once happened to talk about homosexuality, he said that the church cannot accept those who confuse the “sacrament of marriage” (referred to hetero people) with "having fun" (referred to gays), that the church understands the problems of gays, doesn’t judge them and respects them "as all the people must be respected", this specification has enraged me! Then he started talking about family and the gay talk ended up here!
 
At school there is a balance of fear on these things, each one is limited to saying only obvious things, things that can be accepted by everyone. It is the fair of the obvious, of the great principles that are so general and abstract that they no longer mean anything.
 
Politics is also a totally taboo subject and all taboo subjects are carefully avoided by everyone. The priest of religion does not talk about homosexuality and politics, there is no possibility of discussion, others have programs, exams, etc. etc., but if you read the papers provided by the school, they talk about "integral formation of the person", which is not only ridiculous but grotesque.
 
But basically I can even understand the point of view of teachers, no one wants trouble, they only care about bringing their salary home! For them it makes no  sense to open discussions on matters of principle to defend gays! Too risky and not really worth it! Because if someone tried to do otherwise students and parents would immediately stop them or they would end up in ridicule.
 
But what makes me angry are mainly the students; I am absolutely certain that if some teacher would try to do a less stupid lesson speaking "even" of homosexuality in an honest way, he/she would immediately be labeled as gay by his/her own students with all that such a fact entails and I think it can be a real form of blackmailing and persecution, because I see some of my comrades and above all girls who make hallucinatory comments, who are ready for lynching because for them it is only a game that affirms their superiority.
 
The teacher of Philosophy herself has repeatedly pretended not to hear such comments and this is shameful. But, I wonder, if she had intervened what would she have got? They would have considered her at best as a stupid woman who has time to waste.
 
So school goes, at least mine. I want to leave my region, I don’t say Italy, but I want to go to a civil country, where respect is something real, where a guy can be what he really is without having to resort to various tricks to avoid the gay label with everything that comes with it. I read about schools in the north where things are very different, obviously there are still two Italies and I find myself in the less civilized one. I read about guys who attend schools where they can even come out with classmates and find a boyfriend. For me these things are on the other side of the moon.
 
If you want, publish the email, but remove the last part.
 
An angry student!