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Dear Project, I have been on the internet for days trying to understand something more about gays. I'm not gay, I'm a married man and I'm over fifty, I have two sons, a boy of 19 and a girl of 16. Frankly I don’t think that neither my son nor daughter has anything to do with homosexuality. My son will soon get out of school, and exactly for this reason one of his classmates has been coming to our house for a few months. At the beginning, for me and my wife, he was just a school friend of Luke, then slowly this guy began to feel good at my home and we too with him. He often stays for lunch at our home, he is a very polite guy and we like him. 
Well, over time the relationship that has been created has become more important and in the end, one afternoon, he told us he was gay. I can assure you, Project, that I have nothing against gays but at the moment I was afraid, don’t blame me for this because I didn’t understand anything about these things. I thought that my son should know that his friend was gay and with some embarrassment I tried to prepare the speech, when we arrived at the moment I realized that he already knew everything, he looked at me puzzled and told me: "Ok! where is the problem?" I just replied that I thought he didn’t know it, and then ideas of all kinds about my son and his relationship with that guy began to pass through my head.
My son has a girlfriend and it always seemed to me that he was in love with her, things with the girl were fine, at least as far as you could tell from outside, and moreover my son started a few weeks ago to leave his friend at our home to go with his girlfriend. In practice my wife and I (not my son, who in fact doesn’t seem very involved) we ended up considering that guy a bit like a third child.
The feeling that has been created is very particular, Andrew (I will call him so, but it’s not his name) stays much more time at our home than at his and above all he spends much more time with me and my wife than with my son.
The embarrassment of knowing that he was gay didn’t last long but other fears took over, in particular that of keeping him away from his family of which he never talks about but both my wife and I have the impression that he is much better with us than with his parents. In front of Andrew we feel full of complexes, the one who don’t feel full of complexes at all is my son, who jokes with Andrew in a natural way but then when he has to do his things neglects Andrew without worrying about him at all.
I begin to have some fear that Andrew can count a lot (too much) on us and that our role may be a bit too anomalous. You have to know that after his coming out we talked very little especially because we don’t want him to feel under pressure. Basically he comes here at home, and if my son is at home, they study together for a while, at most for two hours, then when my son goes out, Andrew stays at home, goes to the computer (he has his laptop) and hears music or sees a bit of television and stays at dinner with us even if my son is not there. I noticed that my wife was cooking specially for him and I started looking for news about gays on the internet.
I must say that Gay Project has struck me a lot because the guys who write to you seem to me very similar to Andrew. I read a lot of the google site especially because it is more direct and even those who are not in the game begin to understand something. Project, what can I do good for Andrew? I don't want at all to be intrusive but sometimes it makes me a bit of melancholy to think that my son in the evening goes to meet his girlfriend and Andrew must stay alone at home with us. I have asked myself many times how I would react if I saw him (Andrew) with another guy, but I think that in the end I would react well because I think he needs a guy who loves him and it’s not fair that the road should be harder for him.
Here these are the facts, strange perhaps but strangely true. I would never have thought of such eventualities but they happened. If you want to publish the email, I don’t think it would bother Andrew and even less my son.
With great esteem.

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